Saturday, July 12, 2008

Hopes for the Egg Donor

I can't help but think of the donor as she starts her stims today. I hope she is feeling confident in her decision to do this and not wondering why she ever agreed to such an idea.

I remember the first time I gave myself a shot in the belly. I was terrified and thought about it all day, worried if I would be able to go through with it. Of course I did and now I give my shots very causally without much thought.

But I did it for myself and my chance to have a baby. She is doing it for me (though she doesn't know me). I know she is getting some money. A lot of money to me but in the big picture, $5,000 is not that much compensation. Is the money for a down payment on a house, to pay off credit card bills, or to take a dream vacation? I know she is motivated by more than money but I do wonder what this bring to her life besides helping someone else to start a family.

I appreciate her more than she will ever know. When I was in college, many years ago, there was an article about egg donation. I read the article with interest and decided that the process was way more than I could handle. Of course, now I wish I had been the generous sort who did that (though maybe my eggs were crap back then, too) and I could have paid off those college loans a lot earlier. But at the time, it seemed way too invasive. So I appreciate the fact that someone would agree to donate after learning everything that is involved.

I hope she is calm and confident and not second guessing her decision. I hope the shots don't sting or cause a whelp. I hope her young child doesn't see the medications and thing that her mommy is sick. I hope she and her husband are in agreement with this endeavor and that is doesn't cause any tension in the household. I hope she is not doing it out of complete financial duress and is resentful.

I guess what I am getting at is that I hope these eggs are being created in positive circumstances for her and her family. I hope she considers this process a gift that she is giving willingly.

Please send good thoughts and vibes to my egg donor.

God bless her.


Phoebe said...

I think you would have to be a very generous person to be an egg donor. The psychologist who runs my IF support group says that she sees women who have had abortions become egg donors. I hope your egg donor comes through for you! Good luck!

Summer said...

These are some of the same thoughts I had about my donor when our cycle started.

I will be thinking about your donor today and sending good thoughts to the both of you.

Wordgirl said...

I've been thinking good thoughts for all of you and here we are five days on and I wonder how things are in your world?

I'm so hopeful for you!


Karlyn said...

I am about one month behind you in the donor egg cycle and starting Lupron and estrace Sunday. It amazes me how many factors must collide at the same time for all of this to happen and most so much out of our control.